September 29, 2011
When you want to make sure that your children are happy and safe throughout the course of your divorce, you are wishing for something that is nearly impossible. No child is going to be happy during this time because they are going to feel heartbroken and sad. Children are very empathic and they know that you and your spouse are in pain, so they are going to be in pain as well. There are things you can do to try and minimize this damage.
One of the things that you can do is to think about the problems that divorce causes to your children. You will see that they are going to be very stressed out, and you are going to be stressed as well. This is why you should make sure to talk to a therapist and see if your children can do the same. If your children have someone objective that they can talk to, then they are going to benefit in the long run. You are going to be someone that they can trust later on, but they cannot always make this choice to talk to you at the moment because you will be so stressed out.
You may not be able to find a therapist for your children right away, but you should still try to find them one eventually. You will see that some therapists actually specialize in working with children and divorce and they are very good at it. You are best off trying to find a therapist with this specialty so that they can help you with your situation and make the world easier for your child. If they have no experience with this, then they are going to have a harder time helping your child.
You must realize that there is no way to keep your child oblivious to the fact that you are getting divorced. Some parents try to protect their children by not telling them until the last minute. This is not a good idea because your children are going to be in shock. They need time to adjust to the new situation, just like you do. You should not try to keep anything a secret from them; rather, be as honest as possible as smoothly as you can. The more you keep them informed, the better they will feel.
When you want to make things easier on your kids while you get a divorce, you should take this advice. Make sure that you find them a therapist who specializes in these situations. Furthermore, make sure that you are honest with them for each step of the way. This will help you to make the wisest choices as you are moving through the difficult process. Your children may be stressed out at first, but they will eventually be able to be happy and secure with the new situation.